What Happens When The New Wears Off?

I've had the pleasure for the past two days of having my friend L in town to workout with.  She travels for work and sometimes is gone eighty percent of the time, so her being in town and in the office has been a real treat for me.

Yesterday we did an arm workout I created that included bench presses, hitting the heavy bag, curl presses, and a routine with the heavy ropes.  I was quite proud when, after we'd moved on from the ropes, to see a group of guys (who are in the gym every day pumping iron) copying the exact same circuit we had just done. 

Today was beautiful and sunny so L and I decided to do our warm up outside on the riverwalk.  As we trucked along she started shivering and when I asked if she was cold, she said "Yes!  I used to have a layer of fat to warm me up and I don't anymore."  That cracked me up and then I realized that I definitely have become cold-natured since I changed my lifestyle.  It's interesting to see what happens with your body besides what happens on the scale.

As we walked back to the gym to continue our workout inside, our discussion, as usual, turned deep about our weight loss journey. We've trained together in our Transformation program and that created a strong bond between all of us.

"You know L," I said to her. "We've been at this a while; we're on the next leg of our journey and we're not newbies anymore. In some ways that's harder."

You think when you first get started that that is the hardest your struggle is ever going to be; don't get me wrong, it's tough, but the next leg is somewhat harder.  Your body gets used to the initial shock of your lifestyle change and you have to constantly switch up your workout and your food.  You have a tendency to plateau more often.  Your initial strictness slips a little and you have to constantly reign yourself back from slipping into old behaviors.   The new wears off and you have to find the resolve in yourself in order to keep fighting the fight.  You have to find the gumption to keep going because this race is about endurance more than anything.

So what happens when the new wears off?  For me, I draw strength from my support system, like L, take a deep breathe, and keep fighting. Bring on the next leg of the journey.

Twas The First Step Class After Christmas

Twas the first Step class after Christmas,
When this afternoon at my desk
Calves were throbbing and hurting
I felt a hot mess.
My cube neighbors were busy,
Unaware of my state.
As I rubbed on my muscles,
Hoping the pain would abate.
When all of a sudden
The pain increased by two-thirds.
I bit my lip sharply
And said some bad words.
The tiger balm in my bag
Seemed just the thing.
An ancient Chinese remedy
To take out the sting.
I slathered it on
With a generous swipe
And sat back in my chair
To try not to gripe.
Thank goodness for my neighbors
It was the end of the day
Because tiger balm smells
A lot like Ben-gay.
So smelling like the elderly
And walking like a mummy,
I hobbled along
Feeling quite crummy.
But sore muscles they come
And sore muscles they go
And the benefits of exercise
Are less con and more pro.
Come tomorrow I know
My legs will be alright.
So happy workouts to all
And to all a goodnight!

The Tool Box

Last Christmas two of my favorite gifts were my pink Ipod from my husband and my cute black, white and pink gym bag from my Momma.   At the time I had reached ninety days into my new lifestyle change and I guess I had proved to those around me that I was legit so to speak, that the changes in me were here to stay.   These gifts weren't just some nice things to have...to me they signaled a change in myself in that I wanted things for the gym more than I wanted any other gift.

When I proudly showed my new gym bag to one of my trainers last year, she called it my "tool box".  I thought that was a great analogy because (for a high maintenance girl like me) it takes a lot of tools: sprays, lotions, make up, hairspray (to make me presentable after all that sweat at lunch); the Ipod; tiger balm, band aids, and a an ace bandage (because sometimes hurts happen); workout clothes and various pairs of socks that may or may not match; the fourth pair of tennis shoes that I've burned through; and a P90X Kenpo DVD that I keep meaning to return to my brother.

Well, last year's "tool box" has seen better days. It's been thrown in and out of the trunk of my car five to six days a week, it's bounced around on my shoulder over countless miles to and from work and the gym, it's been pawed through and zipped and unzipped, its been skidded across the locker room floor as I've arrived to the gym either late or just in the nick of time, and its been flung on the floor of my desk and living room hundreds of times.  

Today while shopping for a new "tool box" I told the salesman at a local sports goods store that I needed a new gym bag because my old one was worn out.  "That's exactly as it should be!" he said with a genuine smile. "Congrats!  Keep it up."  Being that he was decked out as the obvious triathlete that he was, I took this as a compliment and left with a cute new flamingo pink gym bag (even tool boxes can be cute).

After being off for Christmas and the parade of food temptations of the holidays, I'm looking forward to getting back into my gym routine tomorrow.  My new "tool box" is already packed and ready to go.

Award

Every year my company picks six employees out of thousands to receive the Corporate Health and Wellness Excellence Award and I am shocked, surprised and humbled to say that the Global Wellness Council chose me to be one of the recipients this year. 

Never in a million years did I think I would win any kind of award for health or wellness.  Just over a year ago I was the exact opposite of either of these words.  I never worked out, I didn't watch what I ate, my body was weak and my mobility and balance were horrible.  I sweated, not in the gym, but just trying to move through the daily tasks of my life. My situation was quickly becoming critical.  I was a person who struggled walking one block, who would have said you were out of your mind if you told her that in a year's time she would complete a 5K. A person who could never conceive that she would be associated with anything to do with health or wellness, much less win an award for it.

I tell you about this award not to pat myself on the back, but to point out that anything is possible.   No matter how dark your situation seems, no matter your injuries, no matter your access to a gym, no matter your age or time constraints or budget, you can make something amazing happen for yourself.  It is totally and absolutely possible.

I still have a ways to go on this journey and sometimes it can seem overwhelming, but I am going to steal a line from Revolutionary War hero John Paul Jones who sneered in the face of defeat saying, "I have not yet begun to fight."

Plunging Headfirst

There's this thing in my gym, I'm not sure what it's called, but it's basically a piece of equipment that you get on and press your calves against a pad, your feet on a platform, rest your lower abdomen against another pad, and bend at the waist, head first toward the ground and come back up. Over my time working out I've watched people do this on a routine basis. It's a popular piece of equipment and most every time I go to the gym I see people routinely getting on this "thing."  Some folks put their arms across their chests as they bring their upper body up and down, and some folks even hold weighted plates as they do their reps.   Either way looked scary to me,

There's not many things in that gym that I haven't touched, but this piece of equipment is one that I have avoided.  In my former state of being my balance was pretty much zilch.   I avoided stairs, platforms, ladders...pretty much anything that involved pitting my abilities against gravity, because gravity would always win, painfully.

One of the many things that the gym has cured me of is the fear of pain because at any given moment I have something that's sore from one thing or another and my husband has gotten used to seeing me walking strangely around the house at night when all my muscles decide to stiffen up on me from that day's workout.   Just comes with the territory.   Plunging headfirst onto the gym floor however is one thing that I'm not too keen on, so therefore I've avoided this "thing" that everyone seems so fond of.

In the spirit of trying something new and pushing myself past not only my physical barriers, but my psychological ones as well, I decided to try this new thing.  Making sure no one was watching me, I positioned myself on the equipment and after a few false attempts gripped my muscles in and lowered my head to the floor, thinking the entire time that I was certain to go flipping over my head, onto the floor and break my neck.  Fear tied itself into tight knot in my stomach as I saw the floor coming closer to my face. Then a funny thing happened: my core and leg muscles engaged themselves to bring me back up parallel, over and over until I'd done twenty reps.  

As I've said before, it's the little accomplishments that spur me forward and keep me going. That and the inner curiosity that says, "I wonder if I can do that?" I get so caught up with the numbers on the scale that I forget that I'm not just shedding pounds, I'm creating something really strong. I've been training these muscles hard for over a year and it's cool now to see what they can actually do.

Elf on The Shelf

What a brilliant invention is the Elf on the Shelf! It's such a great way to get kids to behave (i.e., the Elf goes back every night to the North Pole to tell Santa how good or bad the child has been that day) while making it a fun game for them. I know the youngest members of our family have been enjoying their elves this Christmas.

With all the many culinary challenges of Christmas for a dieter, wouldn't it be affective to have an Elf on the Shelf who would observe how you eat during the day and at holiday events and would then report your progress back to your trainer?   I know it would make me think twice before overeating.

Today the elves of my youngest family members, my cousins Maggie and Andi, will be able to give Santa a great report! I was lucky enough to have a chance to be a kid again and build a gingerbread house with them.  In the process though I found myself covered in icing and candy.

With Andi and Maggie decorating our house.

Andi decorated the icing on my hands with a gumdrop.

Icing and gumdrops....where was my Elf when I needed him?  My report wouldn't have been too bad however.  I managed to keep myself mostly reigned in around tables heaped with wonderful Southern food and desserts. Sometimes you have to give yourself a little bit of a treat as long as you keep it in perspective and work that much harder the next day. Learning to have that balance of allowing myself to have a taste of something "naughty" along with filling my plate with mostly "nice" every once in a while, as opposed to throwing the towel in and eating anything and everything I want, is something that with time, I've learned.

Power and Balance

One of my favorite things about working out is the achievement you get from it.   It is something that you are totally in control over.  If you want to make something happen, you can make it happen.  It's not like winning the lottery or waiting for a promotion...if you set a goal with exercise and you stay to your routine, you will meet, and a lot of times exceed, that goal.  How many other times in life do we have that power?

For instance, I don't have it within my power to give myself a raise, but I do have it within my power to complete a 5K.   My brother doesn't have the power to dictate how much taxes he pays per year, but I watched him bench press 185 today (his greatest weight yet) and could see the pride of how good that felt.   I don't have the power to will my husband into taking out the trash every time without me asking him to, but today I set a goal of bench pressing 75 pounds, and I did it!

When the world gets crazy and the stress gets high and it seems like life is all about playing the hand I'm dealt, the gym is somewhere that I can feel grounded.   I may have no control over whatever rate the power company decides my electricity is worth, or however much gas is going for that day, or the hours set forth that I have to be at work, but I know if I want to have control over something, I can do that with my workout.

Not only that, along the way to achieving a goal are awesome little surprises.  Like for someone like me who had such a poor sense of balance that she was terrified of a tiny step to the point that her trainer had to hold her hand (yep that was me in September of 2010) to go to the present me who looked at the balance board in the corner of her gym (as she'd done a hundred times before) and thought, wonder if I can do that?  And I did!   And I didn't plummet to a bone wrenching, neck snapping death as I once suspected I would.   I got on that balance board and held it steady with the strong core and lower body muscles I have been training for over a year.  Then I did some squats and kettle bell swings on it.  I really thought it would be a long time before I could do the balance board, but I guess I never realize how strong my muscles are getting.  I just like to go and workout.  :)

We all have days when we feel like we just can't win.   In those times, hit the gym and it will sure make you feel better.  Hit the gym often enough and amazing things start to happen.

"We're still struggling, just not that bad."

Whew!  It has been a busy kind of week.  Between a hectic week at work, the usual Christmas madness, the gym and being completely addicted to the Hunger Games series, I haven't been online as much.  So therefore I give you some high lights and observances of this week so far:

• An impending deadline caused me to miss my workout on Monday and I felt like crud because of it.
• Marisa doesn't take it easy on the Step class, even though its getting near to the holidays.  In fact I think that puts her even more in the "giving mood." I really might not be able to walk tomorrow.
• I said to Millie, while we did our bike-interval cardio on Tuesday, "This seems easier now than when we did it a few months ago.  I don't think we're struggling as bad."  As our intervals grew longer though, wise Florence said, "We're still struggling, just not that bad."
• Being super busy at work helps you keep out of all this food that is all over place.  Reminds me of the line from How the Grinch Stole Christmas where the Who's "feast and they feast and they feast, feast, feast, feast!"
• A couple of workout buddies have been sidelined with injuries. Sometimes your body insists on a rest.
• Looking at comparison pics is motivational!

Last Christmas

Saturday Night.

Games of Hunger

I'm currently reading The Hunger Games and cannot seem to put it down. Not giving away any of the story, but it involves a heroine who is taken from a desolate life where there is very little to eat to a gleaming capitol city to compete in a fight to the death. When she gets to the Capitol, she's given abundant amounts of rich, wonderful food and she definitely indulges in it, sometimes to the point of making herself sick, because she's used to a life of near starvation.

In Kickboxing today I started thinking about The Hunger Games and how it kind of translated to real life.   How many times have I indulged myself because I was at my favorite restaurant?  Or at a social get together where there were treats that I don't usually allow myself?  Or better yet, because it was Thanksgiving or Christmas?  As illogical as it is, a lot of times don't we approach food like it's the last time we're ever going to have an opportunity to have it? Or worse, ramp our calories back with some crazy fad diet that can't be sustained for the long run, until we finally break and over indulge like we're at our first feast at the capitol city.

Today I wasn't in an arena in a televised struggle to the death like in The Hunger Games, but this is still the fight of my life and I need to treat it as such.  That being said, I highly recommend the book.  I made sure I didn't bring it with me to work because I would have been tempted to skip the gym at lunch and use my hour reading.  Be warned if you decide to read it: it's highly addictive.

What Do You Do When You're Not Feeling It?

For one reason or another, today I just wasn't feeling it.  We all have those days.   Days when our bodies are tired and minds are busy and it seems like all our motivation went down the drain with the dregs of our morning coffee.  We all wish that we could wake up every day feeling like a rock star, but what do you do when instead you feel like an old lounge singer wearing the worst leisure suit in town? What do you do when you just don't feel it?

That was me today as I headed off to Step class. I was sore, tired and dragging. My problematic right quad, that seems to have a permanent strain, had me getting up from a seated position in a walk that started out like Frankenstein and ended up with a slightly less than normal half limp.  The Step routine today was new and challenging (which was awesome) but my legs started cramping halfway through and my workout pants were too long (turns out that happens when you lose weight, who knew?) so I kept tripping over them as I went up and down my step.  I just wasn't feeling it. But I kept going because:

• Quitting one time makes it all the more easy to quit the next time. 
• Any workout, even one where I'm not your best, is beneficial.
• Giving myself an out when I know I can keep going can create a snowball affect.
• If I'm moving, no matter what modification I have to make, I'm doing something. 
• Sometimes success means plugging away at something every day, so that on those days when I don't feel like working out, I just do it because that's my routine.
• Sweat always makes me feel better.
• Not even Mick Jagger is a rock star every day. Some days even he "can't get no satisfaction."

No Rest For The Weary

I would like to say thank you so very much to all of you for your kind comments, reading my blog, and celebrating the milestone of my first 5K with me.  All of these things motivate me and push me along the miles of this journey! I have had such overwhelming support and it is something I regard as a humbling blessing every single day.

A mood of celebration from the race was still in the air today as my Transformation girls and I met up in the gym for our workout.   We all still had a happy glow about us from our success on Saturday that probably won't wear off for a while.  We have faced many firsts together on this quest, and the 5K was an important milestone for sure. 

Changing out in our locker room, the race was the number one topic whether it was shared observances, how sore we were afterward, the level of laziness we achieved on Sunday, or wondering when the next 5K was, because we've all caught the fever.  There's no rest for the weary though, and soon we had to get to our workout.

Because we're junkies, we'd picked a tough one for today, starting out with ten push-ups followed immediately by a ten second plank, repeated five times without rest.  Yeah, our legs were trashed from Saturday so we'd decided to even it all out and take out our arms.  We followed this with ten squats followed by a ten second static squat, repeated five times without rest.  Ever want to see something funny?  Stand across from your friend,do this set, and look at the expression on their face. Hilarious!

Next up were several different exercises with weights, then a row-off on the rowing machine (where I actually beat Millie's 250 meter time for the first time ever, yes I said it!) because after months of doing this exercise, I've finally figured out how to engage my arms and legs at the same time efficiently.  Personally, I think Millie was off her game today, but I'll take a victory however I can get it!

Our workout wasn't over yet and we went on to do more weights, the elliptical, the rower again, and some other things that left us all a sweaty mess.  It felt so good, and even though we are gym veterans by now, I think having completed the 5K has made us all feel fully legit...like athletes. It just goes to show that you don't have to be the fastest one of the pack. Rocky Balboa didn't win his fight in the first Rocky movie.  He went the distance and that was his victory. I was the last person across the finish line Saturday...but I went the distance and that was as good as any Olympic gold medal to me.

First 5K!

Friends when I tell you that a year and a half ago I struggled to walk very short distances, I am not exaggerating in the least.  Just contemplating walking a mile seemed like something way way out of my hemisphere.  Then I changed my life and began slowly increasing my distance in quarter mile increments.  By my side was one of my trainers, Marisa, who would trick me into going a little further each time by making me think we were just going for a stroll and a little girl chat.

Last December I made a goal to do my work's annual 5K this year. I dreamed of having some numbers on my chest and crossing a finish line, as I'd cheered on runners at other races over this past year of getting healthy.  Still, it didn't quite seem real when I picked up my race packet yesterday and pulled out my very first race bib with the number 81 on it. 

Well, it was a day of miracles, the first being that I actually hopped out of the bed at 5:30 am on a freezing morning (or any Saturday morning really being the night owl that I am).  I thought I would be dragging, but I was pumped and ready.  Still, as I was getting ready to go, the old fears crept over me and I remembered all too sharply the way I used to feel walking: out of breathe and lower back cramping making me feel like I was involuntarily curling into the C position. I haven't felt like that in a long time but would that happen today?

I sucked in my fears and headed out to the race with my cousin Devon (who was doing it with me), my husband and my Momma who had made me a sign that said, "Go Mint!" (one of my numerous nicknames in the gym).  Immediately I ran into Marisa and my wonderful Transformation team mates and the excitement started to grow!

Ready for the race: Krysta, Emma, me, Flo and Millie

Flo, me, Devon, Mary, Millie, Krysta and Emma

Who would have thought we'd be doing this a year ago? Almost time to race!

The air was frigid, but our spirits were up as we pinned on our numbers. My nerves started to grow again though as we lined up, Devon and I at the very back.

Almost time!

 Then the countdown began and we were off!  I waved goodbye to my husband and mother and felt fear clench in my stomach, why the heck am I doing this, I can't possibly finish. I was scared friends.  Even though I've been working out for a year, have flipped a 365 pound tire 18 times in 100 degree weather, and completed a two hour Zumba marathon, the distance factor was wigging me out.  That and the police car that followed behind Devon and I as we were the last ones in the pack.

But, as Devon and I always do, we started talking and laughing and the first blocks went by.  Along the way awesome volunteers cheered us on through the streets of historic downtown Wilmington.  We went up and down some big hills that in the past I have avoided like the plague and refused to set foot on.  We walked all the way down and past a restaurant that a group of co-workers walked to once at lunch and when I heard that they did it, I thought never in a million years could I do it myself.  We navigated cobblestones, waved to people and dogs, played a little Tupac and danced a little bit, and commented on the beautiful gingerbread houses of the historic district - all the while escorted by our own police officer who was very encouraging. And I didn't have to stop once.   My breathing was fine and I didn't feel tired at all.  

Soon we'd passed the half-way point, then the two-mile point, and then were on the home stretch.  We turned the corner to begin the straight shot back to the finish line and off in the distance I saw Millie (who had already finished) and Marisa heading towards us.   My heart swelled and I started waving my arms at them and picked up my pace. Then Lakshmi joined us and Marisa told us to jog.   As we always do what our trainer says, we picked up the pace. 

I started to get winded and Millie said, "Come on girl!  Your husband and your mother are waiting for you!" I picked it up, then slowed back down.  Marisa said, "Come on jog! You can do it! I've seen you do some amazing stuff in that gym!"  I picked up my pace.  We got closer and I could see the crowd.  Then I saw my husband and mother and started grinning.   Next Mary and Flo joined us and I was surrounded by my trainer and my Transformation girls.  With them I know I can do anything!   The crowd cheered and my husband stepped out and joined my side and we all jogged in together.  My cousin Devon even said, "This is like something out of a Lifetime movie!"  It was all just as I had pictured in my head that it would be and when I started lagging, Millie hooked my arm in hers and Eric got the other.  When we got close to the finish line though, I dropped their arms and picked up my pace to finish on my own steam.

Coming in.

A little blurry, but check out the looks on their faces; love this team!

YES! First 5K, done!

There were a lot of tears of joy and hugs all around, and an amazing sense of accomplishment. My Transformation group looked around at each other as if to say, can you believe we did that?

With our trainers: Flo, Mary, Marisa, Jeff, me, Millie, Lakshmi and Devon. Look at how far we've come!

Today was a major milestone, and Devon was right.  It was like something out of a movie.  I seriously doubt anyone will ever make The Jennifer Minter Story, but if they ever do, today's scene will definitely be in it!






 

Endurance

At the beginning of step class, Marisa announced that the goal today was endurance. We all looked around at each other as if to say, "Oh snap." And true to her nature, it was epic and just what I needed.  In my time working out, the word "endurance" has come up quite a bit and, when used in the gym, always means you're in for it. 

Endurance also is:

• Making it through a tough class, or a new class, whether you hit all the steps or not.
• Facing the scale on a regular basis, even you'd rather gouge your eyeballs out with a spoon.
• Getting back on track after a bad meal.
• Feeling defeated but fighting back anyway.
• Showing up every day, no matter whether your workout is perfect or not.
• Modifying what you can't do and making your workout fit your situation.
• Facing your fear, whether it be the gym, fit people, or foreign equipment, and sticking in there until eventually the gym is your happy place and those fit people are your friends and you know what to do with that equipment. 
• Shutting up that inner voice that tells you that you're tired, or you're fat, or you won't be successful. 

Even after these many months, these are all things that challenge me still.  Just today in step class, I felt tired and like I hadn't eaten enough prior to coming to class.  My inner voice listed all the reasons that I wouldn't be able to make it through class half-way in. It told me that I was too tired, too hungry, too sore, etc, winding me up until I almost gave up....then I recognized it for what it was and told it to SHUT UP!

I'm not super woman, but I've learned that even a former couch potato like me can endure. The secret is to simply quit thinking about all the reasons not to, or who's looking at you, or any of the other various things that our minds can craft to hold us back.  Miracles can happen when you tell that inner nay-sayer to SHUT UP.

 

 

Landmarks

Before the days of mapquest did you ever give or receive directions to a location based on landmarks? Like, "drive one mile and then you'll see a convenient store, turn there then go up three blocks until you see a used car lot.  Turn left at the car lot then go down to the second driveway on the left, the one with the mailbox that looks like a cow"?  I personally think this is much more effective that mapquest any day.

Back before we knew the proper names for equipment in the gym, we used to remember workouts this way.  Once, on one of our days without our trainer, Millie and I were getting ready to do a workout that we'd written down based on one we'd done with Marisa.  Examining the paper in her hand, Millie had told me, "Okay so we're going to do squat presses, then burpees, then rows, then we're going over to that machine where I cried that day and then we're going to do more squats and curl presses, then we're going over to do that exercise where you cried that day, then we're gonna..."  It was hilarious because without a beat, I nodded along and knew exactly what she was saying.

Today we broke out that old workout, only this time we knew the proper name of everything we were getting ready to do.  We still laughed about our old terms for everything because, after over a year of working out, we've definitely made "landmarks" all over our gym.  Instead of their proper names, certain spots in there could very well be called, "the place where I almost threw up that time," "the place where you called out for Jesus that time," or "the place where I refused to do it and then walked away and cried and then came back that time" among others. They could also be called "the place where I ran the first time," "the place where I realized I was getting stronger," or "the place where you pushed me forward that time" among many other wonderful "firsts."

Today Millie and I did a workout that we've done before, but this time we were able to push ourselves harder, step up our weights, and knew the proper terms for the equipment we were using.  We've been taught a lot and have gone past the novice phase of our transformations.  We can look back on times that we felt unsure of ourselves to the point where we cried and now find humor in it.  To me that just drives home the point that this process is truly a journey, something you have experience as it happens, not all in one fanatic burst. And learning that "that place where I cried that time" is really a smith machine is just the tip of the iceberg.

The Greatest Gift

Whew.  I think I survived Thanksgiving mostly unscathed. I wasn't perfect, but I wasn't awful...and as my wise friend Katie says, "it's persistence, not perfection" that counts.  Maybe we ate bad on Turkey Day and maybe the leftovers called our name the day afterward, but as one of my favorite characters from literature and movies, Scarlett O'Hara was famous for saying, "tomorrow is another day."  Maybe a holiday weekend of treating ourselves can motivate us towards a stricter plan for the upcoming weeks that will ultimately spur, not hinder, our weight loss. 

This is easily the most trying of times for dieters.  We're rushing around trying to get the right gift for everyone on our list, get preparations made for all of those holiday parties and family get-togethers, and trying to balance the usual family and work obligations.  It's a wonderful but stressful time of the year, two things that combine to make healthy eating and getting in regular workouts a challenge.  Like last year, this Christmas season I am going to try to keep at the forefront of my mind the fact that the greatest gift I can give myself and those who love me is health.

The Great Feast

Happy Thanksgiving to all!  It was a great day in our family spent the day in Sanford, NC. My aunt, AKA the Southern Martha Stewart, had the house decorated beautifully with flowers and greenery, pumpkins, and turkey centerpieces made by the younger generation of our family.  And you should have seen the spread!  Aunt Kathy always manages to make sure to have everyone's favorite Southern dishes like dressing and gravy, collards, turkey, cranberry salad, creamed corn, pumpkin pie, peas, roasted veggies,spinach casserole, rice, pork roast and on and on.   As the littlest one of our family, two-year-old Maggie, said to me when we arrived today, "Welcome to the great feast!"

I couldn't resist the dressing (my favorite) but I managed to enjoy myself without gorging so I will call Turkey Day a success.  Then, instead of crashing on the couch in a lunch-induced food coma, the majority of us headed outside with the kids to play games.  The old me would have had a few more rounds at the lunch buffet then crashed out for a nap, but the new me wanted to go outside and move. That assures me that I have truly made a lifestyle change.

Three generations enjoyed the sunshine and good temps outside by starting off with a game of duck-duck-goose, and for some reason the kids kept picking me to be goose. They did me a favor for sure because hopping up from the ground time after time and chasing the kids around the yard got my heart rate up and my blood pumping. Want some cardio?  Challenge a two, three, and five year old to a game of duck-duck-duck goose.  You'll be sweating in no time!

Next up, putting the kids on our backs and running around playing horsey, then some yoga moves on the lawn before taking a ride out in the country air as my uncle pulled us along in a trailer with his tractor.  On the ride home tonight, I told my husband that I don't take anything for granted since changing my lifestyle.  If you've ever been overweight and felt held back due to it, you can appreciate the simple acts of being able to jump up and down off of the ground and run after a child or being able to hop up into a trailer.  For years, the old me sat on the porch, watching everyone else play and wishing for all the world that she could participate.   Today as I sat on the ground in a ring with my family, sweaty from being the "goose" yet again, I looked over to the porch and smiled to myself, thinking of all the many small things that I have to be thankful for.

With Maggie and Andi, love these girls!

Turkey Day

Turkey Day is fast approaching.  Some of us will be sitting down to one of the biggest meals of the year in thirteen hours or so.  With the average Thanksgiving plate totaling up to around 2,400 calories (eek!) how do we dieters survive not being stuffed like the big bird?

This is my second Thanksgiving on my health journey and last year I must admit that I did really good. So here are some of the strategies that worked for me:

• Concentrate on the lean meat and veggies.
• Allow yourself a small serving of that irresistible casserole or delicious dressing and gravy.  If you don't have a taste of it, you'll feel resentful and will end up binging on it (or something worse) later.
• Drink lots of water.
• Distract yourself with conversations with family members. Usually someone's got something crazy to talk about or some sort of news.
• Get up and do something active after the meal; in most families there are some kids running around.  There's nothing like chasing kids for cardio.
• Think about all the things you are thankful that your new body can do that your old body couldn't, and the struggle it took to get it there.  Nothing tastes better than that.
• Realize that Thanksgiving is just one meal and good, bad, or ugly, tomorrow is another day. 

Happy Thanksgiving! I'm thankful for everyone who took the time to read this. 

You'll Be Able to Tell When You Lift Your Arms up!

Millie and I had a locker room debate today on what kind of workout we wanted to do. Seeing as it was Monday, I was leaning towards cardio, but she wanted to do weights so that we can keep up these "guns" Jeff and Marisa helped us create.  Millie and I are both alpha females of sort and as we don't have our trainers working us out anymore, sometimes we have a friendly butting of heads when planning our workouts.

After Millie assured me that we'd still work up just as much sweat and raised heart rate with the pyramid workout she had from our archives, I gave in and decided to trust my friend. And whew, was she right.

It's a good thing there are no video cameras in the gym because we were making some crazy faces at each other.  Our reaction to the strain and pain was seriously youtube worthy.  In no time I was covered in sweat and my arms felt like jello.  That pyramid workout with free weights might look tame on paper but it was a killer in practice.

Looking satisfied as we headed into the locker room, Millie said, "I told you so!" and I admitted quickly that she was right.

We both headed into separate shower stalls and I heard her yelp from behind her shower curtain, saying, "You'll be able to tell when you lift your arms up."

"Ohhhhh!" I yelped from behind my shower curtain as I took my shirt off, "I'll never doubt you again!"

The Eatin' Season Approaches

We are getting ready to be right smack down in the middle of the Eatin' Season. That wonderful time of the year when we celebrate with family our favorite way: eating and making merry.   As Turkey Day approaches, I can already see the Southern feast laid out at my family's Thanksgiving meal and can almost taste that dressing and gravy in my mouth.   How will I make it past that calorie-laden feast unscathed and goals intact?  I'm going to try my best to focus not on what's to eat, but on what I'm thankful for and the many wonderful things that have come from making this change in my life:

• I'm thankful for every pound I have lost and for the future pounds lost to come, because by God that scale will come down.
• I'm thankful for my wonderful family and friends who have supported me so overwhelmingly on this journey.
• I'm thankful for an over abundance of food because there are many out there who don't have enough. That being said, I don't have to over eat it just because it is so available. 
• I'm thankful that even though my right leg is still kind of gimpy, I have full mobility of my body and can modify my exercises and move forward.
• I'm thankful for my awesome trainers and class instructors and every person who has worked out at my side.
• And most importantly, I'm thankful to God who has put me on this journey and who continues to bless me along each step of it.

 How is the Eatin' Season to be survived successfully? Maybe by putting it into perspective.

Putting The Band Back Together

My transformation program ended in October and I must admit that I've felt a little adrift since.  A pulled muscle took me out of 5K training with the rest of my group.  Even though I have been in the gym every day, I felt bummed out that I wasn't able to participate in the running program with the rest of my group because I was counting on that extra time with my trainers. A crazy work schedule kept me away from Step class with my girls so I've been mostly slugging it out in the gym, solo on the elliptical machine.

I've missed my girls and our locker room camaraderie.  I've missed the inside jokes shared pumping iron with them.  Even though it's only been a couple of weeks, my anxiety prone mind began to feel like we'd lost the special magic we conjured over this past year.   I've worried seriously about losing my resolve because the scale hasn't moved and I've had injuries that have forced me to change my workouts and not participate in group activities.

 Yesterday Jeff gave me a bonus workout and kicked my butt up and down the gym, old school style.  He also gave me a "talking to" about keeping up my motivation and tightening up, and it was just what I needed.  Turns out Marisa gave the same speech to the other girls in my group after Step class.  The consensus had been that we were all drifting a bit (no one has gained, but no one has lost either) and needed to pull things back together.

As I left the locker room yesterday, a sweaty mess but feeling awesome, I ran into Marisa who said, "You guys need to put the band back together. Make your schedules work, don't worry about who wants to do what workout, just be together."

And today we did just that.  Walking into the locker room to find them there (I'm always the last one in and am legendary to be the last one out of the locker room) was just what I needed, that and the kick-butt circuit Marisa had written for us.  We recommitted to making the time to put the band back together because we are stronger with each other than without.

Sometimes we drift off the path of our journey a little.  For a Type-A personality like me who is highly resistant to change, that drifting off means exercising every day but freaking out that things weren't as they used to be. Sometimes we are put to the test and forced to face challenges and one thing I've learned lately is that those challenges are much easier to bear with partners at your side to lift you up, inspire you, and push you farther that you are willing on your own to go.

A lot of people I've talked to have told me that they were most successful when they worked out with a buddy or a group, but stopped when that support system wasn't there for one reason or another.   To those folks I will pass on Marisa's wise advice to put the band back together.  And to those who find exercise a chore, I say put a band together, whether that's a neighbor to walk with or friends made at a Zumba class.  This is way to hard an endeavor to go at solo

Challenge: The Motivation To Start

In my "former life" how many times did I say, "Okay, for New Years I'm going to get started working out and watching what I eat"? Then it became, "Okay, January's shot so I'll start in February." That lead to "Well, February's shot, I'll start in May...that will give me enough time to get ready for summer." That became, "Okay well summer's here and I haven't started, and it's hot, and I'm busy, and it's Tuesday and nothing good starts on Tuesday, and now it's fall and it's getting cold, okay  it's the holidays so who can lose weight during the holidays so I'll just start for New Years."  Oh vicious cycle, I do know you well.

Getting started is hard.  Obstacles large and small present themselves, most prominent being the sheer motivation to get going.  We are more often than not our own biggest critic and nay-sayer and getting past the inner enemy is one of the hardest things you can do.  When I first started I thought I was much more likely to sprout wings and fly than be consistent in a workout program.  I had no hope that I would be successful, I had no cardio stamina, I had a bum knee that I never thought would support me, and the logistics of getting a workout in during my day and eating correctly overwhelmed me.

If you find yourself in this situation or in a hard one of your own, I say this: have hope and take things slow.  Don't make the mistake most of us do and decide to jump in hard core every day at the gym.  This is a recipe for disaster that in the past I was guilty of making over and over again.   Luckily my trainers are smarter than me and started our group out for the first few weeks working out twice a week and that was it.   For the first few weeks we didn't even change our eating.  Additional workouts and changes in nutrition were pieces of the puzzle that were gradually added on, and the funny thing that happened was that those two days a week working out were so invigorating that we were looking forward to adding on more days.  We started feeling great and wanted to feel better, so we were ready to eat right.

What worked for me to get started on that very first day was to shut off the mind that told me in every possible way it could that I couldn't do this, and just let my feet carry me to the gym.  And believe me when I say to you that if I could do it in the shape I was in, anyone can.  I'll leave you with some wise words by the immortal Dr. Seuss:

From "Oh! The Places You'll Go" by Dr. Suess

"Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You’re off to Great Places!
You’re off and away!
You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the guy who’ll decide where to go."

 

Challenge: The Food

Moving on down the list of the challenges in my poll...and this one's a doozy. 

• What is the thing that we use to celebrate every holiday, rite of passage, or celebration?  Food.
• What do we bring to people who've lost a loved one or gained a new baby in the family? Food.
• What is the factor that makes up 80% of whether we lose weight or not?  Food.
• What do we look forward to as comfort at the end of a hard day?  Food.
• If we feel we deserve a treat for one reason or another, what do we turn to most? Food.
• What is the centerpiece of our family traditions?  Food.

Hands down my biggest challenge, and the one that most of my friends say affects them the most, is making the right choices with food.   You can hit the gym every day and work yourself out till you're exhausted and dripping with sweat, but if you don't eat right, you won't lose weight. It takes a 3500 calorie deficit to lose just one pound, and unless you live in the gym, you have to modify your eating in order to play the numbers game right.

What's even more challenging is the fact that you can't get away from temptations.   They're everywhere from the commercials on TV for the $9.99 pizza deal, to the leftover Halloween candy that floods your office, to the family birthday dinner, to the sandwich artists at Subway who tell you for just a dollar more, you can upgrade to a five dollar footlong and look at you like you're crazy when you say "no thank you."

In fact, I can't think of any other addiction that you can't go cold turkey on because you must have food to live.  Imagine someone who is addicted to cocaine and gets clean, only they have to do a small amount of it three to five times a day in order to live.   Would they ever get clean?  But that is the challenge facing those of us who have food addiction.   We physically must have food to live so we can't put it down like an ex-smoker can put down the cigarettes and walk away forever.  The challenge that faces us is to learn how to modify our addiction and make it manageable to eat three to five times a day and not fall off the wagon.

I'm still working on it and probably will be the rest of my life.  It's been a year and I'm still finding out things about food I thought was "safe" but that turn into calorie traps. Just this morning I heard on the radio that a banana has just as many calories and sugar as a Snickers bar.  I haven't verified that but it stands to reason.  Now nutritionally, it's obvious what is the better choice.  But still, I don't think I'll be eating any more bananas anytime soon. 

I don't have any magic cures or surefire tricks to conquering the challenge that is food. It's been over a year and I am still learning to look at it as a source of energy, not reward or comfort.  There are still pitfalls that threaten to trip me up along the road of the journey every day.  The trick, as is the advice when kicking anything else, is to take things day by day and to forgive yourself and get back on track if you have a slip-up. And also know that this is a hard struggle, and it is commendable just to have decided to attempt it.

Slacker Karma

I've made no bones about my dysfunctional relationship with the stairs by my gym.  They've been like a metaphor for my weight loss journey as I conquered my fear of them (yes, I used to fear plummeting to my death on the stairs the way some people are afraid of spiders or heights) from the days where my trainer Jeff would patiently set goals for me to go up just a few until I was doing the full set, to the encouragement my team mates and friends would give me to take the stairs down to class instead of the elevator, to eventually writing a workout for myself and our group that included running up and down said staircase five times. 

I've also recounted the many ways Jeff would pop out at me when I was least expecting it and make me take the stairs, as well as the various cat and mouse games I've played trying to avoid him and take the elevator (my best attempt is here if you're interested). I mean hey, I felt like I was getting ready to go to the gym and burn major calories, didn't I deserve an elevator ride?

Today my slacking karma caught up with me.  It was Monday and I had finally managed to drag myself to the gym a little after three o'clock. I was tired and feeling squinty after staring at my computer screen all day. I could have sworn my gym bag was filled with heavy rocks as I made my way down to the fitness center and rounding the corner I came across two choices: the stairwell or the elevator.  Slacker that I was today, you can imagine my choice.

Yawning with the afternoon sleepies, I got on board, scanned my badge and hit the button for the gym's floor.  Doors shut closing me in and I waited.  The elevator didn't go anywhere.  I pushed the button for the gym again.  Nothing.  Scanned my badge and pushed the button again.  Nothing.  Pushed the button again.  Nothing.   Pushed the button for my current floor.  Nothing. Said a bad word and pushed the button.  Nothing.  Started to hyperventilate and pushed all the buttons.  Nothing.  Saw myself plummeting to my death.  Nothing.  Pushed all the buttons again and imagined my tombstone reading, "Here lies Jenn.  She should have taken the stairs." Still nothing. Hit the emergency call button and then wouldn't you know it, the elevator doors opened up on the floor I started out on.  

I flew out of the elevator with wobbly legs and heart palpitations and guess who just happened to be walking by at that opportune moment.   My trainer Jeff.  After hearing of my ordeal, he laughed, shook his head and said, "you should have taken the stairs." 

Challenge: Staying Motivated

I've been taking a poll on this blog to find out what challenges us most about the weight loss journey.  All of the challenges I've listed come from personal experience, and I don't think I'm alone.  No matter if you're just getting started, have started and stopped, getting back in the game, or in the thick of the battle, we all face these challenges. I'm no expert and my journey is far from over, but I've been at this long enough now to have a little experience with the hurdles that come along.  I'd love to say that it gets easier once you've been fighting the fight for a while, but these trials tend to come in like the tide every so often to test us. But the good news is that getting through them is not impossible..you just have to know them for what they are and then you can be prepared to overcome them.

So, tonight I'll tell you what I know about the challenge of finding the motivation to stay going. We've all been there: starting out fresh on a weight loss journey, pumped and ready to go.  We are raring to go, we jump in with both feet into working out and new food plan, the first week is challenging but then a good number on the scale puts a fire in our spirit and we're ready for more.   The weight starts coming off, we hit our stride in the gym, we start to feel better, people start noticing a change, we become hooked on that workout high, we get some new gym shoes,  our energy level goes up, we feel strong, we sleep better, there's a pep in our step - and then BAM! Something happens to throw us off our path.  It could come in many forms: an event like Thanksgiving or Christmas when we just can't seem to resist the seasonal treats, a hard and stressful situation that sends us running for the chocolate or a bag of Doritos, or it could be the weeks and weeks of fighting our basest urges with food and sweating it out in the gym only to face an unforgiving scale that either stays stubbornly the same or worse, goes up.

I've chosen to address this challenge first because it's close to home with me right now.  My program ended a month ago and the scale hasn't moved up or down.  Without my trainers to be accountable to, I've let the food slip a little bit and I struggle with pushing myself the way they did.  My team mates and I have had different, demanding work schedules so we haven't been able to work out together and motivate each other in the gym as often as we'd like.  Not to mention the various assorted and sundry injuries I've had lately that make workouts more challenging. Just writing this now makes me start to panic a little bit about how things were in my program and how they're not now.

But, what I realized today was that I am in a period of testing.  Left to my own devices, I now must face this challenge to keep myself motivated.  Do I let my old behaviors take me out of the game or do I reach down deep inside and prove to myself that I can do this on my own? Do I pass or fail the test?

The motivation to keep going doesn't come easy. My friend Debbie has a great saying, "weight follows behavior, just not right away." Basically this means that if you keep doing what you know is the right thing to do, eventually the weight will come off.  This doesn't mean you have to be perfect every day.  This just means that you have to show up.  You don't have to have the best workout of your life every time, you just have to move your body and know that every step taken, whether its a walk around your neighborhood or a rotation of the elliptical machine, is a step in the right direction. The pain and struggle of working towards your healthy goal is so much better than the pain of feeling unhealthy any day. I read somewhere (and the author of the quote was not known): "Losing weight is hard.  Maintaining weight is hard. Being fat is hard.  Choose your hard."

This week I chose my hard.  I put myself back on my plan of eating whole foods and I showed up at the gym every day to do anything I could, strained foot and pulled quad and all. I trust that my weight will follow my behavior, even if it's not right away.   My motivation this time around is to prove that I've conquered that old bad part of myself that got me into the place that I was, so I say this: whatever you need to grasp onto, use it.  It might be fear, as in my case, or it might be a special event or a health scare or the need to feel better to keep up with the people in your life.  Whatever it is, use it.  And choose your hard.

Plateau, Oh No!

Plateaus are frustrating.  For four solid weeks that blankety blank scale hasn't moved up or down one bit and despite my efforts, I find myself at the same weight (almost down to the tenth of a pound) as I was one month ago.   Plateaus are inevitable; this is the third one I've experienced on this journey, but they are oh so aggravating especially when I am this close to the milestone of losing 100 pounds. 

Plateaus can also be constructive.  They force you to re-evaluate your process and shake things up.  I myself have been relying way too much lately on Lean Cuisines and the like, rather than the whole foods that have brought me success. While the calories between the two ways of eating are comparable, whole foods are a lot less sodium and a lot better for you at the end of the day. 

One thing I've learned going through this process is that you can't keep things the same for too long; our bodies lose weight when they are confused whether in response to different food or new exercises. Today I started back on my whole foods and left the frozen diet meals in the freezer. If you find yourself frustrated due to a plateau, keep your head up and resort to trickery.  Eventually the storm will break and the scale will be your friend again. 

And, speaking of frustrations: I am taking a poll to find out what is the most challenging aspect of the weight loss journey.  It is on the right hand side of the blog.  I'd love to know your thoughts!  Thanks!

Day Two in an Ace Bandage

Today was Day Two of having an ace bandage on my foot.  My Transformation Team Mates took off to 5K training and I was benched, at least for that activity.  It was kind of a bummer to miss out on training with them, but I knew not to push it and hurt myself worse.  So, once again I found myself at the gym trying to find a work around. 

Lucky for me, my friends Autumn, Sharon and Dana were down at the gym when I got there. I have worked out with them before and I always end up learning something new from them.  After doing some cardio on the treadmill (I put the speed low and the incline high in order to not stress out my healing foot), I learned how to do my first bench presses with Autumn.  We did burn out sets (among other things) that I am sure I am going to feel tomorrow.

I was so grateful to have folks to work out with today when my motivation was low, folks that will push me to try new things and challenge myself.  In exercise, as in business, it's good to diversify.  This way, you not only confuse your muscles and learn new things, but you make your network of support even greater and that's always a win/win.

Where There's A Will

Getting injured was one of my early fears on my weight loss journey.   I wasn't scared of getting hurt in the gym because I trusted my trainers, but what I feared most was the (at the time) inevitable injury or sickness that would take me out of the game. This was a fear of mine because in every other attempt at exercise and weight loss before this one, that injury or sickness would be the excuse I needed to take myself out of the game, a convenient little escape clause.

Call it bad luck, call it Murphy's law, or call it the devil, but over a year ago in my first month of working out, I came down with bronchitis, a two bugs (one respiratory, one stomach), various strained muscles, and had a terrible cut under my arm that cracked and bled every time I worked out my arms. I worked out through all of those and did whatever I could in the gym because I knew that if I let one of those things take me out at that stage of the process, I was likely to be out for good.  Now, some of those times I definitely pushed myself too hard and probably shouldn't have been working out, but just showing up to the gym and doing whatever I could do was what I needed to do for myself so that I still had that accountability.  Do I recommend it?  No. But that's just what I had to do to overcome that hurdle and change that part of my behavior.

Prior to my lifestyle change of last year, I got sick a lot.   At least every other month I had a cold or bug or virus.  Prior to that change, I had terrible balance and fell down and hurt myself, a lot.  Quite quickly, however, my weight loss, improving balance, and stronger immune system due to better nutrition caused another unforeseen change: I quit getting sick and quit getting injured. And that was even being in a gym constantly where germs run rampant.   Just goes to show that the many benefits of a healthy lifestyle change aren't just limited to what happens on the scale.

Over the weekend I managed to pull or strain something in my left foot, causing me to not be able to put much pressure on it by the time Sunday rolled around.  Confined to the couch for the day, I found myself in the old position of being hurt and laid up.  This time I didn't panic however.  This time, as I propped my wrapped foot up and caught up on the backlog of my Tivo, instead of panicking about not being able to work out, I formulated a workaround plan. "Looks like it's an upper body kind of day tomorrow," I told my husband.  "What if you can't stand?" he asked.  "Well then I'll just do it sitting down," I said.

And that's just what I did. I'm not advocating pushing yourself beyond the safety point when you're injured or sick and there are always times to throw in the towel and trust yourself to get back on the horse when you're better, but if you can find a safe workaround, where there's a will, there's a way. That's the difference in me now versus who I was fourteen months ago: the will.

The Big Secret

More often then not when people find out or remark that I've lost weight, the very next question they have is how did I do it?  And isn't that one of the biggest questions we face in this era when so many of us are struggling to lose weight and the nation is facing the obesity crisis?  Well I am here to tell you that there is no secret to how I've done it.  There is no magic pill or medical procedure or crazy eating plan. I'm not knocking other ways of weight loss because you have to do what works for you, but I knew that for me to make this work this time, I would have to fight my way through this rather than take a faster way out so that it would be a true lifestyle change that would be permanent. I'm not a professional trainer or nutritionist, but if you're interested in my weight loss process, here's the high points:

• I started by simply getting moving.  For the first week or two, I didn't change my way of eating at all and got to the gym twice a week.  Gradually I started adding on workouts until I was at the level I'm at today of working out five to six days a week.
• Next I changed what I ate. I watch my calories and try to make the majority of what I eat lean protein and vegetables and try to limit the carbs.   Carbs are my weakness and I've noticed that I lose more on the weeks that I really try to eliminate them, regardless of my calorie consumption.  I've also learned that the cleaner I eat (i.e., the less processed food), the better my weight loss and the greater my energy.
• Water is so important, but I struggle with drinking enough of it for some reason. I have noticed that I am a lot less hungry when I push the water and that I have much more energy.
• I'm still not good at going to bed early, being the night owl that I am, but they say that aids in weight loss.  I'll report back when and if I ever manage to go to bed at a decent hour.
• The true difference this time around is the friendships I've made with the people I work out with.  A lot of times when my will to work out is waning, just knowing that my buddies will be in the gym motivates me to go hang out with them. On days when I feel discouraged, they lift me up.  When I feel like I can't do something, they cheer me through it.  They provide constructive competition to push myself harder, and I hope that I do the same for them. 
• The last piece of advice that has made the difference for me this time around was that I took my safety net away. When I was getting ready to start my change, my instinct was to keep my goals to myself and let people notice my weight loss when and if it happened, but then I realized that in doing this, I was giving myself an out. So, I decided to not give myself a loophole.  I told everyone I knew what my intentions were: my friends, my family, my co-workers, random strangers in line at Subway... That's how this blog was born. I wanted to make sure that if I gave up on my goals, I would have major egg on my face. Some days, that's all the motivation I need to keep myself on target.  Take your safety new away and see what happens, you'll be pleasantly surprised.

 So, no great revelations right? No new innovations or fancy tricks.  Just the basics, but as my friend and workout team mate Millie says, "This weight loss means more this time, because we've fought so hard and worked so hard for it." Well put Millie, and very true.

Winning!

Earlier this year Charlie Sheen's bizarre ramblings on the Today show sparked several popular catch phrases, including the most quotable, "Winning!" The phrase quickly went viral and made Sheen even more newsworthy, to the point where his likeness was even one of the most sought after Halloween costumes this year.

So what constitutes "winning"? Charlie Sheen's perspective is all over You Tube, but for those of us who fight the weight loss battle every day, we don't always feel like we're winning.  It's easy to feel like a winner when the numbers on the scale drop, but if you've hit a plateau or feel frustration, it's hard to keep your head up sometimes.   I am seven pounds away from the milestone of losing 100, and I've hit a plateau.  It happens from time to time, but it still sucks when you fight the good fight every day.  The natural tendency is to be hard on yourself, but after several plateaus and pitfalls, I'm starting to learn to step back and look at winning in a different way:

• If you show up at the gym on a regular basis and do anything for any amount of time, that's winning. 
• If you mess up on your eating plan, but get back on it, that's winning.
• If you have the guts to step up on the scale, that's winning. 
• If you show up for class and stay till the end, no matter how many moves you mess up, or how many times you have to stop and catch your breathe, that's winning.
• If you can't do an exercise like everyone else, but you modify it and keep going, that's winning.
• If you've fallen off the path, but got back on it, no matter if it's the second or the twenty-second time you've made a fresh start, that's winning. 
• If your muscles are sore and your will is weak but you push through anyway, that's winning.
• If you know you're the underdog, but set out to prove everyone wrong, that's winning.
• If you've ever resolved to "go down swinging," that's winning.
• If you draw strength from others and pour that back into those fighting along side you, that's winning.
• If you keep fighting, keep moving, keep caring about your goal, keep showing up, that's winning...no matter what the scale says.

Things That Are Scary

Things That Are Scary

• The price of a good pair of running shoes.
• That you have to walk two miles to burn off a Snickers bar.
• Flying off the back of a treadmill (done it twice).
• The amount of calories in an Olive Garden breadstick.
• 5K training...starts tomorrow.
• Carb cravings at 10pm.
• Facing the scale after eating Chinese buffet.
• The gleam in a trainer's eye when they say, "This is gonna be fun."
• Working out thirty minutes after eating chili (I have tested this theory and it is not a good idea).
• The birds out on the Riverwalk where we walk at lunch sometimes.  Okay, maybe they're just scary to me, but still. 
• Doing the treadmill at a 10 incline; I tried to explain to our trainers that I am not in fact a mountain goat, but up the treadmill went anyway.
• The sign outside KFC that says "everything is better with bacon."
• The dessert table at my church's homecoming.
• Any table at my church's homecoming (so much delicious Southern food).
• Paula Deen's new butter-flavored lip gloss. 
• All of this Halloween candy.
• The thought of what my abs are going to feel like tomorrow after Sculpt class today.

 Happy Halloween!

Beach 2 Battleship

It's amazing what can happen in a year!  Now that I am a year plus into my journey, it's becoming fun to look back and see how things have changed; it spurs me forward and keeps me going.   Last year this time, I was about a month into my weight loss program.  I had lost almost twenty pounds and was starting to feel a lot better. Even so, I was a little nervous then about volunteering for the Beach 2 Battleship Iron Man Triathalon, because it meant over three hours on my feet, something that I had not been able to do in a long, long time.  Last year I made it through my first triathalon volunteering, learned all about Heed versus water, managed to get myself covered in electrolyte gel and thus attracted the attention of nearby bees, and accomplished making it through those hours on my feet, though at the time it was very hard for me.

Fast forward a year to today when I headed out to volunteer again at the aid station for the Beach 2 Battleship Triathalon.   This year my table was at the top of the hill and I found myself with the job of making sure the cups stayed full of Heed and water and that we had an ample supply of electrolyte gel and pills.  Not only was I on my feet for over three hours, but I made countless trips up and down the hill with jugs of water, sleeves of cups, and several trips with a 5 gallon cooler full of Heed.  At one point I was heading up the hill with some water and Jeff jogged up next to me saying, "Let's run." So I ran because as I've said before, I do everything my trainers tell me to do.

It was inspirational to see all of those athletes who, if they were doing the full Iron Man, had swam two miles, biked over a hundred, and now were running a twenty-six mile marathon. There were people of all shapes and sizes, as well as all age ranges, including some senior citizens.  Just goes to show you that with determination, you can do anything. Whether it's completing an Iron Man or sticking with a diet and workout plan for over a year, if you keep plodding away, you can cross the finish line, and it feels amazing.

2011 Beach 2 Battleship with my friend Kim, sporting our pink for breast cancer awareness.

Me and my friend Heather, who is a champ and a fighter herself!

It Was a Dark And Stormy Night

It was a dark and stormy night.  Wind whistled outside the window like the desolate and foreboding wail of a banshee.  Inside the house even the roar of a crackling fire couldn't warm the bones or shake away the dread that was descending like a heavy cloak.  Lightning crashed and thunder shook the walls.  Fear caused the stomach to clench and the chest to feel like an iron belt was steadily tightening and tightening as the heart thump, thump, thumped a rhythm of terror.  It was coming.  There was no escape, there was no release, there was no where to run.  Sooner or later...we all must face...the scale.  Ah ha ha ha.  Scary but true.

Something else that was scary today, Tabata class. To find out what Tabata is, click here.  Freddy Krueger and Michael Meyers having nothin' on side plank Tabata intervals.  It's probably going to be scarier in the morning when I'm stiff and sore, but I felt amazing afterwards.

Happy early Halloween y'all!

Last Halloween, about a month into my program.

This Halloween.  Boo y'all!

You Know You're on a Journey When...

You know you're on a weight loss journey when:

• You take off everything decently possible before getting on the scale and wear your lightest clothes for weigh-in day.  I myself remove my glasses, accessories, and ID badge.  I once even saw an old lady shimmy down to her slip in the middle of a Weight Watchers meeting before getting on the scale.
• Have ever audibly said to the scale, "Seriously?!"
• You can recite the caloric content of each of Jared's favorite subs at Subway.
• You've given the treadmills in your gym Seven Dwarf-esque names based on their attributes: Squeaky, Creaky, etc.
• You realize that you have started talking in short words: quads, rep, carb, Step, squat.
• Waiters at restaurants you frequent hate to see you coming with all of your meal customizations and calorie inquisitions.
• You've become such a protein hound that you seriously start to wonder if maybe you've been bitten by a werewolf. Must. Have. Meeeeeat.
• You can tell 30 second increments without looking at a watch.
• You can pick something up and easily guess how much it weighs.
• You don't realize how strong you've gotten until you accidentally sling your groceries across the yard when unloading them from the trunk. (True story)
• You're not satisfied unless something hurts.
• You find a website online that tells you how far you have to walk to burn off different increments of Halloween candy. Yes, two miles for an average sized candy bar..trick or treat?
• You end each day with a George Jefferson limp, but realize its all worth it.

Out of the Cube and Into the Light

The beautiful day and mild temps lured us out of the gym today and into the sunshine. Cube rats that we are, we emerged blinking from the building into the wonderful weather outside.  Immediately Millie, Charles, and Flo took off running towards the River Walk, but with my pulled quad, I had to make do with a careful power-walk.  The old me would have felt frustrated and bummed out to be left behind, but the new me knew that I would catch up with them at our usual workout spot soon enough.

Sometimes I think people get deterred from working out due to lack of access to a gym, but there is so much you can do just using the space around you.   Outside areas are not just for running or walking, you just have to get creative.  On the River Walk we did several squats/plants/step-up/sprint (power-walking for the injured)/bench dips (100 of 'em) circuits, guaranteed to make you feel the burn.  And then we had to walk back to the building.

Squinting in the sun, but workout done: Millie, Flo, Me, and Charles.

It's fun to get creative with workout locations. You can pretty much find something to burn calories anywhere outside.  Need to add some strength training to your cardio routine but don't have any weights?  Using your own body weight with exercises like planks and bench dips is all you need. Keeping workouts varied and interesting is what keeps me motivated.  And the beautiful weather is just icing on the cake (pardon the cake reference).

Who am I? I am a champion!

My much needed new shoes were so ready to go today that they practically jumped out of the gym bag. Boy they felt good!  Eagerly I jumped onto the treadmill, cranked up my Ipod, and started to run.   The new shoes felt so good that I started running faster, and then faster, and then the fastest I've ever run.  Then, fifteen minutes in I felt something bad in my right quad and had to stop.  I hobbled off the treadmill and over to where my brother was working out to stretch my leg out.

Seeing me limping, Jeff came over to inquire, "Does it hurt?"

"Only when I move it." I responded then realized how dumb that sounded.

I looked around the gym, not ready to throw in the towel but acknowledging that the bike and the elliptical machines, and pretty much anything involving legs was out.   Then my eyes fell on my old pal the punching bag.  Cranking the music up again, I proceeded to pound the heck out of that bag until I felt like my arms were going to fall off.  Where there's a will, there is a way.

One of the best things I've heard in a long time is a speech by a high school football coach, pumping up his team.  If you want to get rallied, take about three minutes and check this out: I am a champion!  Some of the quotes that resonate in my head are, "I have trained my mind and now my body will follow" and "my heart and my mind will carry me when my limbs are too weak."   I've listened to that speech at least five times today, and its rally cry, "Who am I? I AM A CHAMPION!" carried me through my workout today.

Give it a listen, I promise you won't be disappointed.

I Have No Words

What do you say to the people who have saved your life? How do you begin to say "thank you" for such an amazing gift like the one I was given? Not an easy task.

Today was our wrap-up meeting for our Transformation program and Jeff and Marisa had created a movie presentation of our pictures and videos set to music.   As we watched it, there were a lot of laughs, some tears, and a lot of awe as we saw ourselves in action and remembered the amazing times we've had.

Then it was our turn to get up and speak about the experience.  Now, I am a trained Toastmaster and never at a loss for words, but my emotions felt very raw about this and I was nervous. As each one of my team mates got up and spoke, I found myself in their words.  I smiled and laughed and cried along with them.  It was impossible not to.

When it was my turn, I reluctantly stepped forward and found that I literally couldn't speak. Tears began to flow and I couldn't look anyone in the eye. But, these people are my family.  They've fought at my side, held me up, shared my triumphs and my challenges, dried my tears, cheered me on, and encouraged me every step of the way. I knew I could trust them.  Slowly the words came out in halting, breathy phrases and I hope that I was able to convey my gratitude to extent that this amazing experience deserves. 

To my team and my trainers: for every inside joke, every locker room therapy session, every friendly competition, every cheer, every high-five and fist bump, every drop of sweat shed together, every encouragement, and every victory dance beside the scale,  I am grateful.   I love y'all and I'm ready to take this journey to the next level with you!

My two heroes and the best trainers anyone could have, Marisa and Jeff.

I love this team! Back row: Mary, me, Sylvia, Millie, Jeff and Jeff M. Front row: Marisa, Frank and Florence