Moment For Life

I had the best workout of my life today!  Jeff and I did a boxing workout and I finally realized why people love fitness so much.   I used to think that people that worked out for fun were just lunatics.   Why in the world would you want sweat and move your body when you can sit on the couch, eat some Little Debbies, watch "The Biggest Loser" and cry? I was never into sports, I dreaded PE in school, and always parked as close to anything as I could. But now I finally understand what all of my fellow gym rats got into a long time ago: it feels good to move.  Today Jeff had me boxing the heavy bag and it was crazy to see how far my endurance has come.   I don't know exactly how to describe the feeling of punching something as hard and as fast as you can and feel your body actually working with you and not against you. The feeling of letting your mind go and feeling your muscles take over. Of actually being good at a sport and feeling really alive and powerful. Who knew I would be good at boxing?   I love it!  Something in me just likes to fight!  I've always succeeded when it comes to academics or the arts, but to actually feel like I'm getting good at physical activity is something I've been craving my whole life.

Four people I talked to today expressed their desire to find the motivation to get active.   I don't really know how to tell people how to get motivation other than to simply tell yourself that you're just going to give it a shot like I did when I met Jeff for my first workout and see what happens.  The motivation will come.   I wish that I had some sort of ability to actually show people how BAD I felt before and how AWESOME I feel now.  It has been less than 6 months and I have completely changed my whole life. It's staggering.

Nicki Minaj's "Moment For Life" is on my Ipod right now.  I love the message in the lyrics:

"In this very moment I'm king
In this very moment I slayed Goliath with a sling
This very moment I bring
put it on everything, that I will retire with the ring
and I will retire with the crown, Yes
no I'm not lucky I'm blessed, Yes
clap for the heavyweight champ, Me
but I couldn't do it all alone...

I wish that I could have this moment for life
Cause In this moment, i just feel so alive." 

Deep Thoughts From the Ipod

Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are. ~ Kurt Cobain

Every life has a measure of sorrow, and sometimes that is what awakens us. ~ Steven Tyler

Because you can't, you won't, and you don't stop. ~ The Beastie Boys

Faith, Hope, and Love

I read a wonderful devotional today about faith, hope and love.  It said that you have to have hope first before you can have faith, and that once obtained, faith won't last if you don't have love.  It was so true that it sent chills down my spine!   For so long I stayed in an unhealthy body because I had quite frankly given up hope.  While watching a 638 pound man on a TV show go painfully about his day, the message was obvious that he'd also given up hope.   It's daunting to face such a huge task of losing weight and so therefore I think lots of people - my former self included - give up before they start.  

People can't have hope on demand.  They have to find it for themselves...and the way you do that is latch on to one small thing and let it slingshot you into a new life.   My slingshot was promising the trainers at work that I would show up for that first workout.   I had no hope that I would be successful at this, but I latched on to that small commitment to be down in the gym at 3 o'clock. By 4 o'clock I had my hope back.   I cannot tell you how good that feels.   And now, through having that hope, I have faith in myself that I'm going to be successful at this and that I'm going to be healthy. 

Faith is also made of love.   The more I open myself up to this journey and where it is leading me, the more love comes my way from family, friends and co-workers. It makes me want to take that support and pour it back into other people by helping them.   Faith. Hope. Love.  It's a win/win situation.

Am I My Own Punching Bag?

I had a fear (shocker) that once the new had worn off of this health kick, that I would be a backslider and quit like every other time.   It happens soooooo easily.   Something comes along (lunch with a friend, a bad day, inclement weather, a virus, a Tuesday) and suddenly there wrapped up with a bow is the excuse to slack off.   And then once you've slacked off that one time, once you've eaten that piece of pizza or chicken salad on a pretzel roll,  well the bad behavior boogey starts.  You eat pizza for supper because you've already eaten a hamburger for lunch.   You figure the next morning is Tuesday and you've already ruined the week so why not stop at McDonald's for a biscuit.   And oh jeez, it's now the middle of the day and what's the point of eating healthy, you've already blown that good work out.    Pretty soon you're back to not exercising and prescribing to Vitamins Ben and Jerry and swearing that you're gonna start on Monday.  And then after too long of that, you stop promising to start on Monday.    Then even New Years doesn't seem viable to you and then you give up hope that you can ever do it.   It's a dance I know very well.   I've even invented a few steps.

So I live in fear of slipping back into my old ways.   I woke up this morning in the kind of bad mood that I couldn't shake off.  I was "ill as a snake" as we say around my way.  Doesn't happen that often, and you'd probably never know it to look at me, but ill none the less.    None of my "happy" tricks were working and wouldn't you know it.....instead of something good for lunch, I ate chicken salad on a pretzel roll.  I was so mad at myself after I ate it.   And on weigh in day too!  And did it make me feel better?  No.  I felt worse.   What did make me feel better was training with Marisa and taking it out on the punching bag.  I guess the point is to not make yourself your own punching bag.  Take what is internal and hurting and push it out of yourself in a healthy way.   Worked for me.  I know my husband was grateful I didn't come home in that funk!

A Healthier Start

All the snow is almost gone - yay!   Ironically I ran across a photo taken on our first snow day of last year.   So, for comparison:

On a snow day at the beginning of 2010

The beginning of 2011, off to a healthier start

Arrrgh

My awesome friend Sylvia joined my workout today. It was so much fun to work out with her.  Jeff gave us a challenging routine and it was good to have someone else there to make faces at.  Have you ever looked around the gym at the faces people make?   I know I make some funny ones.  For some reason today it helped to squint my face up, close my eye and make a Pirate-looking face on the press part of the curl/press. Arrrrgh.   Hey whatever works right?

Sylvia, a self-proclaimed grouch in the gym, had fun.   She's looking forward to next time and so am I!   It's all about the buddy system.   And you don't just have to have one buddy.  I'm surrounding myself with like-minded people who lift me up.

Go Sylvia!  You were a rockstar today! You and I are going to get this done together!

Step Class Swagger

Eric, as I did the George Jefferson across the living room, "Are you limping?"

Me, "Shoot, that's just my step class swagger."